October Haul – Spoonie Edition

Hi all,

I rarely do posts like this, but I want to get into doing them more!

I do buy a lot of beauty products, I guess you could call it a hobby (since I don’t play the guitar anymore, damn you EDS). Skincare, body care, make-up brushes, you name it, I’ve got them! A lot of females are the same, but since becoming ill, I’ve been focusing more on beauty and spa products that will help me, and to be honest I was surprised how many brands there are out there with products focused on relaxation.

So I started purchasing from brands like Burts Bee’s and Champneys Spa at Boots and I wanted to see how I could benefit from these products and how they’d help my body (plus, I love experimenting with bath and body products, who doesn’t?)
I needed all the help I could get when it came to bubble baths that actually help aches and pains, and sleep sprays that actually, you know, HELP you sleep. So, through trial and error I found a few great items that I know i’ll re-buy again and again. I’ll explain under each item why it helps, how its helped and where to buy (most, from Boots).

 

Feather&Down

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Feather&Down is a brand sold in Boots stores and online in the UK. I’ve never tried any other Feather&Down products but this spray makes me want to buy their collection. The spray is a beauty aroma of lavender and chamomile, but isn’t too strong. I use this spray around my room around 5 minutes before bedtime along with the Champgnes Linen and Pillow spray.

Burt’s Bee’s

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I love Burts bee’s. I started purchasing mini’s from this brand back in 2015 when I moved back home and I love them. I’m so happy I got back into buying these products, and I started my collection back off with the Tips+Toes kit that I got back in the winter of 2015 and its a brilliant introduction into Burts Bee’s and what their products are like. 
The kit include

 

  • Almond Milk Hand Creme (0.25 oz.)
  • Hand Salve (0.3 oz.)
  • Thoroughly Therapeutic Honey & Grapeseed Hand Creme (0.75 oz.)
  • Coconut Foot Creme (0.75 oz.)
  • Lemon Butter Cuticle Cream (0.3 oz.)
  • Replenishing Lip Balm (0.15 oz.)

My favourites of the kit have to be the ‘Thoroughly Therapeutic Honey and Grapeseed Hand Creme’ which really is therapeutic. I don’t know what it is about this hand cream but if I’m getting joint pain/swelling it really helps calm my hands down and has the best smell! The other favourites have to be the coconut foot creme which I now have in a larger size (which is the best foot lotion you can buy, it’s sticky, and the substance is very much like honey so it really does work and get rid of any dry skin). Last is the lip balm that Burts Bees do. I bet a lot of you have heard of the conspiracy that many lip balms have tiny bits of glass particles to make you buy more lip balms, I can guarantee you, Burt doesn’t do this ;).

Champneys Spa

22014832_1901873866741240_54491356_nChampneys Spa has been a life saver for me since finding them in Boots. Last Christmas I wrote a little list for my grandma of things I would like that I thought would help me and she got me a mini Champneys set with the Good as New Heavenly Days pillow spray. Since using that mini, I’ve had several more bottles of this stuff because it really does work. I like to use a mixture of Champneys and Feather&Down in my bedroom and on my bed linen before bed because it really does relax you and send you into another zone, even if you aren’t ready for bed. 

21979403_1901873806741246_39888758_nThe other Champneys products that I’ve been using are the Heavenly Days Good As New Bath+Shower products. The best of these products has to be the bubble heaven. It’s very thick, but once swilled around in bath water it creates bubbles like you’ve never seen in your life! They also have the same scent as the pillow spray, so if you use these before getting into bed linen with the Feather&Down spray then you’re guaranteed a good nights sleep.

Thanks for reading and if anyone has come across any other products in September that help spoonies, e-mail me!

Jess
xxx

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ADVENT CALENDAR TIME


Ok, so this isn’t exactly a blog post, because I can’t review the items, as I’ve opened a total of 0 yet! I just wanted to share these little gems!
Super excited for Christmas!

Body Shaming

Girls of all kinds can be beautiful – from the thin, plus-sized, short, very tall, ebony to porcelain-skinned; the quirky, clumsy, shy, outgoing and all in between. It’s not easy though because many people still put beauty into a confining, narrow box…Think outside of the box…Pledge that you will look in the mirror and find the unique beauty in you.’

Tyra Banks

o-DEAR-KATE-570One thing that really, really frustrates me is how society has its own image of beauty. You are either too skinny, too fat, too small, too tall, and so on and so forth. Anytime you walk into your local shop you’re usually faced with newspapers with bold headlines and glossy magazines with shocking revelations. Beyonce has ‘rolls’? How awkward is Taylor Swifts posture? How fat has Selena Gomez gone? Is she spiralling out of control?
But why are we so obsessed with body image and weight? Why can’t we just be happy with the way we are without comparing? As humans we can be our own worst enemy, but it’s even worse when it’s being pushed down your throat and fed to you by the media.

All my life I have been a very skinny child and teenager, I have had skinny legs, skinny arms, hardly much of a chest and a small bum, and only recently started to fill out and I was made to feel incredibly awkward and uncomfortable with my body in my younger years, as most people do. I never starve myself, I’ve always ate (relatively) healthy meals, I eat a LOT of high calorie things and yet I still barley put weight on… some may call me lucky, some may call me out on it, but me? Well, i’m me, i’d be happy even if I did put weight on, and it bothers me why body weight can threaten people, and cause them to dislike you because you look a certain way.
I’ve known people all their lives be called for being ‘too large’, as myself for being ‘too skinny’, were made to feel extremely awkward and uncomfortable, and it really is not nice. Once, while working as a waitress, I got called out for how skinny I was and got asked if I’d had anything for my tea that night… I’d actually ate like a horse that day… how somebody looks isn’t necessarily to do with what they eat for one, and for two, a lot of it actually comes down to genes. If we’re from a naturally larger built family, the likelihood is you will be passed down the same genes as if someone came from a naturally skinny family.
A lot of evidence suggests that our genes have a big role in determining our weight, so you’re basically calling someone out for the way they naturally are… that’s unfair… the same as skin colour, we can’t control it, we can’t really change it, some people can’t control their weight.

I’ve also never understood why there is so much hate towards size 0 women, as some people are naturally size 0 and don’t really put weight on. I have never understood why there is so much hate towards size 18 women, as some people are naturally larger and can’t take the weight off so easily, and look fine as hell as they are. And heck! Is there such thing as an ideal weight and size? As long as we are healthy and as long as we are comfortable, what is the issue? There is so much hate about being curvy, there is too much hate about being thin, and these issues really don’t need to be raised unless its a hazard to the persons health. The issue in my opinion that needs to be raised is why can’t we all be comfortable without somebody making a comment? Why can’t we be happy in our own skin and brag about it?

I believe that there should be a campaign for women to be comfortable in their skin no matter what size. It hurts and upsets me for people to call me for being ‘under weight’ and I have been called ‘anorexic’ too many times in high school, and this is not ok. Anorexia is a serious health issue, and nothing like that should ever be thrown around to use as an insult to someone, and it is insulting that somebody would think its ok to use it. These things are not ok. Being called ‘fat’ and ‘morbidly obese’ and other hurtful names is again, it is not ok.

We are in 2016 people. This should not be an issue anymore. If you feel like you have to body shame somebody, then take a good long hard look in the mirror.

You’re all beautiful. Every single last one of you. Tall, small, black, white, blonde hair, blue hair, who cares? Everyones unique in their own way, remember that, don’t ever change yourself because you don’t look a certain way, you look like you for a reason, it’s ancestry that lives on and you should be proud of who you are. 🙂

Jess

Urban Decay’s Newest Edition

Urban Decay has brought out a new Vice palette and I honestly think that they’ve stopped my heart. They’re KILLING it recently. First they took my breath away with the Gwen Stefani palette (still in the process of writing a review for that, so keep your eyes peeled) then they brought out their lipstick collection by Gwen and NOW 16 days into the new year they’ve made beauty headlines over EVERYONE’S blog about their new Vice palette. I first heard the news on HelloGiggles and was straight on Google for where I could buy one.
I do have to admit, I sadly only own one palette by Urban Decay, purely because I’m a poor student *cries* but I’m making sure that I add more to the collection this year.
I’ve loved the look of their previous Vice palettes… but this one, is a must have for me. This palette has a wide range of colours from the pictures I’ve seen already, they have the perfect mix of old shades and new.

urban decay 1

In this palette they’ve included 3 totally new shades *eeeek*, 5 vintage shades, 5 exclusives from past palettes and 7 bestsellers from their singles collection. So it sounds like it’ll be the type of palette that… well, anyone could use. And I love that, I love how diverse Urban Decay are, they offer something for everyone. From black matte to metallic brick red, to pale taupe-silver satin to deep olive green matte shades, this palette would work well for any occasion.

Not only are the eyeshadows to die for, the palette itself is beautiful. They’ve really outdone themselves with the packaging.

urban decay 2

It’s safe to say that even though I only own one Urban Decay palette, that it’s the best eyeshadow palette I’ve ever owned and I would recommend it to anyone to buy, the price puts a lot of people off, but they’ll last and last and you won’t need to keep buying cheap palettes that you end up never using because the colours aren’t pigmented enough, or they don’t come off the brush properly.

Apparently in the US it’s hitting stores on the 24th, I’m not too sure about the UK but I can imagine we won’t be far behind.

Are any of you guys thinking of purchasing this palette? Let me know in the comments below!

Jess
xxx

~ Naked Skin ~

I love nothing more than a fresh feeling face. I love the feeling of zero make-up and being able to give my eyes a good rub and not worry about messing up my winged liner and my eyebrows ending up on my forehead (as Kylie Jenner would say ‘not cute‘).

Since falling ill (I say falling ill, I was always ill, but since being diagnosed) I’ve ended up wearing less and less make-up during the day, even if I go out on a night when I’m well enough it’s minimum, 95% of the time, so I’ve been delving into the ‘naked skin‘ look more and looking at what products can help create the perfect look that will also make my skin feel like it’s make-up free (near enough).

I love using the Urban Decay Beauty Balm in shade Medium as that gives a flawless coverage that I’m always complimented on, and it’s so thin it feels like you’ve barley got any make-up on. It doesn’t cover everything, because it’s simply not thick enough, but when I’m going for the naked skin look, I don’t really want it to cover every imperfection. It’s light and it’s such a lovely glowing colour that it lasts all day round. The other beauty balm I love to use is the Simple BB Cream. I bought my mum this for Christmas and she loved it that much and got so many compliments that my Grandma also bought it and loved it equally as much. It’s the type of product that any age can use, I’m 19 and love it, my grandmas 70 and loves it. It’s made by Simple skin care so it has nothing in it that can irritate your skin. It’s a little thicker than the Urban Decay Balm, but I love it equally as much and it’s a good alternative as it’s much cheaper than the Urban Decay one.

The mascara I’ve been using a lot recently is the Rimmel day-to-night mascara, it has two different wands, one for day and… well, one for night! The day one spreads your lashes out and adds length and doesn’t clump at all. You can build and build it and it still won’t clump. I use my eyelash curlers when applying this mascara. It really gives a good natural look for your eyes. If you want to go crazy, add a pale pink or a cream colour to your eyelids.

For eyebrows I’ve been using what I always use, the Make-up Revolution eyebrow kit. It comes in 3 different shades, so some days when I really wanna do my eyebrows but have zero effort I just use a mix between the lightest shade and the medium shade to simply fill them in, which takes all of 20-30 seconds and they never come out too dark, they always just look natural and I love doing that. Instead of drawing the arch on, and making them longer/thicker, I simply just colour them in with this kit.

Lastly, over Christmas I asked for some Burts Bee’s things off my mum and she bought me a set that included some of their nourishing hydrating lip balms. They’re that good I now own 5. I never want to go without this product now in all honesty, and some of the balms have a tint to them so it’s perfect for a naked skin look with a touch of pink (it will state if they’re tinted on the tube, usually the tinted ones are a little more expensive). My favourite lip balm out of all of the ones I own is the Burts Honey balm. It smells sooooooo good!!!

Jess
xxxx

Opinions on Medical Marijuana

Medical Cannabis/Marijuana is a touchy subject for a lot of people.
On one hand, you have the people who are open minded and aren’t against it for medical or recreational use and see no harm in a plant being sold/distributed by the state. I share this view. But on the other hand you have people completely opposed too it, and don’t want a Class B drug legalised, and then you have all the people in the middle who have views from both sides but can’t really make their mind up on the topic. You get fed a lot of information on cannabis, some true, some … not so true. So let me clear things up a little bit for those of you wanting to know more.

This is purely from a personal perspective. Any information used within this post has been double AND triple checked.

From being a child I can remember very vividly all the news headlines and the warnings off both my parents, and other family members.
I can remember the ‘Cannabis kills your brain cells‘ talks, and ‘don’t smoke pot or you’ll lose your mind‘, or ‘Only chavs smoke Pot‘ but none of these statements are 100% true.

Put it this way, if we’re going to do a scientific study of cannabis to prove something, and we do it on monkeys, and then very nearly completely intoxicate them with 30 marijuana joints per day for around 90 days, a human will die, never mind a monkey.
The monkeys began to waste and die with hardly any oxygen, so of course it’s going to cause brain damage, that would happen to anyone. The brain damage was later proven not to have been a cause of the cannabis used in the study. More to do with… well… suffocating the poor monkeys!

The things we are told by the media aren’t always accurate – and that’s why I clash with my mother so much on the topic, and as a planet we get brainwashed by those in power and the media, into believing certain things that aren’t 100% accurate or true.

The term Medical Cannabis or Medical Marijuana refers to the ‘use of Cannabis and its Cannabinoids to treat disease or improve symptoms’. The only issue is the use of cannabis as a medicine has not been rigorously scientifically tested, often due to the restrictions in its law although Cannabis has been proven to help over 70 different conditions including Cancer, Arthritis, MS, right down to my conditions which are primarily PoTs, Fibromyalgia, CFS/ME and a suspected autoimmune disorder.
It helps with my pain, my sickness, it helps me sleep, it helps with my appetite amongst so many other benefits.

As an example, I will use myself and my health condition to explain further how it has helped me. I started smoking back when I was 17 as a recreational every now and then thing, and now at age 19 I have been to Amsterdam and seen what a country can really be like with it de-criminalised, and that’s when I really got into researching the benefits of it, even before I fell ill last year.

Now I smoke it more than every now and then, and it really has helped relieve an awful lot of my symptoms. Cannabis smoked in a pipe helps me relax, and focus, it also helps with the widespread muscular pain that I suffer with, which can be unbearable at times and steers me off other medications that are addictive such as Tramadol.
It helps my appetite, and I can eat a full meal without feeling bloated and being in pain afterwards, or feel my blood pooling in my abdomen.
It has actually helped me get to sleep at a normal time and wake up at a normal time feeling refreshed after such a deep sleep, and I find it hard to sleep through the night sometimes without waking up crying in pain that I can’t move.

If you go on the Talk To Frank site, and go onto the ‘Cannabis’ section, there’s a lot of stories and info on the drug for young people to read, and learn more about. One particular paragraph caught my eye a while back now, and it states: “Cannabis effects how your brain works. It can make you feel very anxious and even paranoid, it can make it difficult for you to concentrate and learn, make your memory worse and make you feel less motivated“. Now, this is true to an extent. Like alcohol, or any other type of drug, it affects every single person differently. Take a bottle of wine (for example) and share it between 3 friends, one could get emotional, one could become a happy drunk and one could be the drunk that is just dying for a kebab. Just like alcohol, cannabis affects each person differently. I have a friend (who wouldn’t mind me using him/her as an example) who suffers with anxiety, and can’t smoke weed as it brings on his/her panic attacks. Then take me for an example, I suffer with anxiety and smoking cannabis helps me relax, and I haven’t ever felt paranoid or on edge whilst high (besides the odd few times where I’ve not been in the right environment and I’ve only felt anxious about being caught, because its illegal, no other reason). My memory is great, and my concentration is even better. If I have one joint, and turn my laptop on, I can complete an essay of University work because I’m so into what I’m learning and writing about, where-as other people may zone out and want to stick Pineapple Express on instead.

Then I moved on too the next statement which said: “Cannabis can mess with your mind and with your mood. It can disturb your sleep and can make you depressed. Some will become anxious, panicky, and even aggressive. You might see or hear things which are not there (known as hallucinations) which may be frightening. For some people, cannabis causes hours or even days of anxiety, paranoia, delusions and hallucinations that usually only settles down after the cannabis is stopped” . Never, ever in my life have I had a high off a joint that’s lasted more than… 2 hours, max, maybe push it to 2 and a half hours. It bloody helps your sleep, tell me after a heavy smoking sesh you don’t have the best sleep ever? Because I know I do, and all my friends who smoke do. I have also never met an aggressive pot smoker, try and put aggressive and stoner into the same sentence, you can’t, it’s impossible, we’re the friendliest people around. Like I stated, it affects everyone differently. Take a male who has bipolar, depression and anxiety, you could give him a pipe with cannabis in and he could smoke it. He could be irritated, paranoid and unsettled for the duration of his high, that means you don’t give him a joint again, it just made him worse, simple right? Then take another male who has cancer and hasn’t ate for weeks because of the side affects of his Chemo, you could give him a pipe again, with cannabis in, and he could be eating a sunday dinner cooked by his mum within the hour. Don’t use statistics that are based on a small group of people, we need a wider medical study on people with all sorts of different underlying conditions too get a majority on how it works with them. Then we could look into following some of America’s states steps and getting it legalised/decriminalised.

We could look into edibles, pill forms or vaporising. I personally don’t care if it’s legalised for recreational use, because a lot of people will get their hands on it for medical use anyway if they wanted it, purely for pain management, but I think if it’s legalised for medical purposes, we should do the same for everyone else who wants too just smoke it every now and then, like going down to the local for a pint.

We are never going to get anywhere with medical studies, never mind legalising for recreational use, if people don’t know the wider pictures of how it can help people, and how these warning signs do actually only affect one in so many people who will consume cannabis.
Like I stated, it’s the same as any person on any type of drug. Not every human can consume cocodamol. Not everyone is going to fit under the ‘cannabis is great‘ category because that would be impossible.
From the medical side, it will be hit and miss with people having it on prescription, but more will be hit than miss, and more will get benefits out of it than keeping it illegal and leaving people with no option but to go to a dealer, then the government complains about the crime rates but then never agree to discuss online petitions in the houses of parliament for legalisation that get over 200,000 signatures?

Before you make a judgement on the topic, just take a look at me.

12006077_1602559070006056_21333170205615374_n I’m 19, and I was a high achieving University student before I fell ill, but I still have a lot ahead of me for the future and cannabis has only done good for me, never bad, and has never held me back. The only thing that has… bingo! MY ILLNESS.
My illness that no prescription drugs are helping to date. My illness that can rob me from my basic capabilities when my flares are extreme. My illness that is still baffling doctors to this day because it’s so complex and still poorly understood.
Nobody I know has ever become addicted, I find people become reliant on it, but never addicted, if they don’t have it for 3-4 days (for example) they wouldn’t be climbing the wall for a ‘fix’.
There’s a lot of people like myself who are young and want to have a natural option to medication rather than pumping our young bodies with all sorts of pills and potions that never do anything anyway.
I honestly don’t see why we aren’t following the other countries, and the states in America that are passing the law. I don’t understand it at all. Why do we keep getting pumped with bad information on cannabis in the news? There’s good and bad to everything, yet tobacco that actually causes millions of deaths per year is still legal. Oh, and how many deaths has Cannabis caused alone in history? That’s right, none.

On debate.org there is a question about the legalisation of cannabis in the UK. They asked their readers to vote on it. A whopping 85% voted yes. That should say a lot… shouldn’t it? But still, David Cameron and the conservatives will not discuss this. All I have to ask them is… why? Seriously, why?

You also find that those against it have either never tried it, or didn’t have a nice high when trying it. Neither one of those is a reason to get at people for using it.
One comment on the debate.org site was off a UK citizen who seems to think that cannabis damages your insides and makes you reckless… Again my friend, it depends on the person using it. But you also have a string of positive comments on the other side, and what’s the top 2 consisting of? THE DISCUSSION OF IT HELPING THEIR MS.

I could go on forever and ever, but I’ll stop here.

Please let me know what your opinions on the subject are, and if you agree or disagree with me. I’m not usually open about things like this but I do feel like it’s a subject that’s been brewing for a while, and I’ve needed to comment on it.

Jess
xxxx

Winter Skincare Routine

Whilst it’s now January, I decided to do a post on my favourite skincare products and how I use them day-in day-out as part of my routine for keeping my skin fresh, hydrated and not flaky and dry. Winter always seems to dry my skin out where-as in summer I have no problems at all with my skin, it tans easily and never really dry’s out or flakes (even after being in the sun!) So I have to take extra special care of my skin during these months, and these are my top picks on products, and how I use them. Enjoy!

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  1. First, let me start with the Burts Bee’s facial cleansing towelettes. These price at £6.49, which is more than I usually spend on facial wipes – I always purchased Boots own or another cheap brand, but I found that they really hurt my skin afterwards and dried my face out even more, which isn’t good. But since getting these wipes they honestly have really worked well with getting rid of excess oil and removing my face make-up. They also work well with eye make-up but be extra careful as they can sting your eyes! They smell amazing and leave my skin feeling fresh for a while after usage. I like to use these first after a long day as they get rid of the most make-up. Handy tip: If you want them to last longer, cut them in half. I usually use 2 towelettes per night when taking off my make-up.
    All in all, I love these wipes, they aren’t dry like other brands and are very handy to have, even on the go.
  2. Lord&Berry Make-Up Removing Cream.  I love Lord&Berry purely for their lipsticks, I always have and through browsing the web I found out they had a Make-Up Remover Cream out that I just had to try. Now I love remover creams, they feel so much more delicate on your face and can leave your skin feeling so soft, and usually do a good job of getting the make-up off that wipes miss so I thought I’d give it a go a while back, and wow. I love it. I usually use this 2nd when removing my make-up, and as it was expensive I use only a tiny amount to get rid of the last traces of make-up, especially around the nose and chin area, and it works perfectly. High recommended. (Also: It has a lovely scent too it. So if you have sensitive skin, I would swerve this product as it might not react well).
  3. After removing my make-up, I like to use the Simple Moisturizer lotion. It leaves your skin feeling lovely and soft and it can be used for any skin type as it has no perfume in it.
  4. Finally, I like to use It’s Potent Eye Cream by Benefit. A little pricey, yes, but 100% worth it. I’ve used this eye cream most days now for over 2 years, and it works wonders. I suffer naturally from dark circles under my eyes so I wouldn’t miss this out in my beauty routine. It’s really helped with my dark circles, and it’s lived up to my expectations. It’s lightweight, none-greasy and sinks well into the skin without stinging (as the eye area can be very delicate).

Jess

xxx

– 10 Things about Me-

  1. I am a massive Taylor Swift fan. Taylor or GTFO. I’ve been a Swifty since Fearless and haven’t looked back since. (and have attended Speak Now, Red and the 1989 tour).
  2. I’ve wrote stories, poems, bits of books and songs from as far back as I can remember.
  3. I can play the guitar.
  4. Since age 10 I’ve always known what I’ve wanted to do.
  5. White is my favourite colour 🙂
  6. Cranberry juice is my favourite drink.
  7. I love CATS!
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  8. I enjoy Eastenders a little bit too much.
  9. I don’t have just one best friend. I have a group of people I’m lucky I can trust, and each one of them mean the world too me.
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  10. My family means the world too me.

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2016.

Hi all, HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Ahhhh, there’s honestly nothing like turning over to BBC 1 at 11:55 and waiting for the countdown of fireworks galore over Big Ben and the London Eye.

Now it’s 2016 I want to focus on 5 main things I want to achieve this year. Or at least in the first half of the year.

I’ve decided the main 5 have to be completely honest, I had to think long and hard about my choices, and I think I’ve picked a good first 5.

1) Get my health sorted. Don’t dwell your life away thinking of hospitals when you aren’t in one. Focus on what you can do those days, focus on the people around you.

2) Collaborate with other Bloggers.

3) Start as you mean to go on. (In other words, start everything with a positive attitude. Start things and complete them. Good impressions, good start, etc)

4) Start Yoga.

5) Finish Orange Is The New Black S3 and cry until season 4 comes out.

So, those are my goals *for now* for 2016. (Side note: if you wanna collaborate with me, e-mail me @ miss-jessica-foy@hotmail.co.uk )

What goals have you set yourself for this year? What do you want to achieve? Do you think 2016 will be your year? Let me know 🙂

Jess

xxxx

The Chronic Tale of the Chronically Sick

Chronically ill, and broken hearted,
Hospital beds, and treatment to be started.

How long can I sleep, before waking up in one piece?
26 hours to be exact, but it doesn’t give me any release.
How far can I walk, without falling down?
Because once I fall down, the earth doesn’t make a sound.

How much water and salt, can one body take?
Gallons won’t do much, I’m already starting to break.
And how many people, can one person truly lose?
Enough when they release, they don’t want to walk in your shoes.

Failed relationships, and tests, I ask, how much more stress?
My body can only take so much, my heart feels much less.
Swollen feet and sickness, this is our life,
So much anger and hatred, like 50 cuts from a knife.

You ask, how can she be sick, when she looks just fine?
You work long hours, and shifts, and then wonder why I whine.
The pain is deep inside, somewhere you cannot see,
So how can you judge me, as I fall down on my knee’s?

Everywhere hurts, and everywhere swells,
We silently judge on those with the littlest of dwells,
Though we don’t judge much, because… no we can’t,
We wouldn’t wish this on anyone, no matter how much we rant.

Before you comment on the lady, parking in the disabled bay,
You see her smile to her husband, but her hearts filled with dismay,
You can’t see her illness, her pride shines through,
She’s waited 5 day’s to get out, this much is true.

We sleep for days, we cry for nights,
There’s only so much we can lose, oh, these countless fights.
Don’t worry about us though, we’ll be just fine,
But we can’t cure our hurt, with a bottle of wine.

Sober and numb, it’s all too soon for me,
I was happy and active, now I swim in a cold, black sea.
No boyfriend to be heard of, which friends can I see?
I’m the girl with the drip in her arm, in the soaked through tee.

Chronically ill, and broken hearted,
Hospital beds, although my life has just started.